National Adoption Day

"We must work tirelessly to make sure that every boy and girl in America who is up for adoption has a family waiting to reach him or her. This is a season of miracles, and perhaps there is no greater miracle than finding a loving home for a child who needs one."

~Bill Clinton, adopted as a child

National Adoption Day is a collective national effort to raise awareness of the 129,000 children in foster care waiting to find permanent, loving families. National Adoption Day has made the dreams of thousands of children come true by working with policymakers, practitioners and advocates to finalize adoptions and find permanent, loving homes for children in foster care.
Since 2000, the goal of National Adoption Day has been that every community in the U.S. will have an annual, institutionalized, self-driven celebration of National Adoption Day on or near the Saturday before Thanksgiving, which can include finalizing adoptions of children from foster care and celebrating all adoptions. In total, more than 25,000 children have been adopted from foster care on National Adoption Day.(From the National Adoption Day website)

In Denver, they had National Adoption Day today. 95 adoptions were finalized today. 95 children now have their forever families. When I was a baby, I spent my first 5 months in a foster home until I was placed with my forever family. E has spent time in foster care and at the end of 6 months, we will officially be able to adopt him. Unfortunately, there are still thousands of children who still need their forever families.

Below are a few myths about adopting through the foster care system:

MYTH: Children in foster care have too much “baggage.”

FACT: This is perhaps the biggest myth of all. Children in foster care—just like all children—have enormous potential to thrive given love, patience and a stable environment. Just ask former U.S. SenatorBen “Nighthorse” Campbell or Minnesota Viking Dante Culpepper. They were both foster children who were adopted by caring adults.

MYTH: Adoptive parents must be a modern version of Ozzie and Harriet.

FACT: Prospective adoptive parents do not have to be rich, married, own a home, or be of a certain race or age to become an adoptive parent (Nearly one-third of adoptions from foster care are by single parents). In fact, families are as diverse as the children who are available for adoption. Patience, a good sense of humor, a love of children and the commitment to be a good parent are the most important characteristics.

Did you know that more than 29,000 children reach the age of 18 without ever finding a forever family? I can't even imagine turning 18 and not having a family, a place to call home, no one to spend the holidays with, and no parent to call when times are tough.

I had one kiddo on my caseload that was in the foster care system from the time she was 8 years old. She bounced from foster home to foster home, in and out residential centers, and eventually aged out of the foster care system. I have thought about her so many times, wondering what happened to her. Her father was in prison, her mother was dead, and she didn't have any extended family members. At least none that wanted to have any sort of contact with her. Did she have some issues, yes but none that couldn't have been resolved by a little love, a stable home, and a little guidance. Where is she now? I have no idea.

I know that adopting from the foster care system isn't for everyone but maybe it's for someone you know.

Below is a quote that a friend wrote on a card that she gave me at the "Welcome E party"

"Somehow destiny comes into play. These children end up with you and you end up with them. It's something quite magical."

~Nicole Kidman, an adoptive parent

I love this quote and feel that this perfectly describes what happens with us and E. I hope and wish that so many more families and children get to experience this magic.

Visitors and a party

Last Thurs, my sister and her husband came to Denver to visit us and meet E. We had been showing E a picture of Aunt Laura and Uncle Phillip leading up to the visit and talked about how they were coming to visit. When they first arrived, E was napping. When he woke up and first saw them, he ran up to Laura and gave her a huge hug then gave on to Phillip. He was not shy at all! He couldn't wait to show them his toys or his room. We always know if E "approves" of someone as he wants to take them upstairs so he can show them his room.

I think E really enjoyed having four people totally focusing only on him. At the foster homes that he was in, there were always other children. E had so much fun coloring and playing with cars with Laura and Phillip. E can't say Aunt Laura or Uncle Phillip yet. He can say "aura"...well when he wants to. For Phillip, well he became Pop Pop.

On Saturday, E, Laura, and I went to a "Welcome E" party that was hosted by some amazing friends. E had so much fun with all the kiddos and loves all the gifts that he received. One of the ladies that hosted the party is E's Guardian Ad Litem(GAL). C is the one who told us about E. Without her, we would have never met E much less have him now as our son.

Andy and I had been talking for awhile about getting something for C just to say thank you. How do you find something that can even begin to say thank you for letting us be E's parents?? Every time I thought of C being E's GAL, I just kept thinking about how he was so lucky to have such a great caring person to watch out for his best interests through out the time he has been in the system. Someone who was there to make sure he was safe, to make sure a loving home was found for him. Unfortunately some kids who are in the system don't have GALS who are as great as C.

One of the kiddos(age 4) that was on my caseload when I was a caseworker, would always call her GAL her Guardian Angel. I always thought that was so cute. Once E came into our life, I realized how right that little girl was about how a Guardian Ad Litem really could be a Guardian Angel. I found a Willow Tree figurine that was called "Guardian Angel". It is an angel holding the hands of a child. This was what we had been looking for since C truly is E's Guardian Angel.

At the Welcome Party, we gave C the figurine. Of course as soon as I gave it to her, I had tears rolling down my face. Those happy tears have been flowing alot lately. =)

On Sunday morning, Laura and Phillip had an early morning flight. E was still asleep when I took them to the airport. I was so sad for them to leave but it wasn't as hard as it usually is since we'll be seeing them again in just over a month. After E woke up and finally realized that they were gone, he was so sad. He was not a happy camper for at least two days. He kept asking for "aura" and "pop pop".

A few things we learned about E during the time Laura and Phillip were here:

*If you have a hooded sweatshirt on and are holding E. Hide the strings. He likes to try to put them up his nose. Also, if pillows have tassells that hang down..hide them as he likes to put them up his nose as well.

*If you are the lucky one to put E on the potty, do not stand in front of him. If so, hope his legs are closed when he pees. If they're not, you will get peed on. Laura was the lucky one to get peed on. I don't think I've ever seen her laugh so hard.

Settling in

On Oct. 30, we picked up E for the last time from his previous foster home. We couldn't believe this day was finally here...no more waiting for "the call", no more transition visits, no more saying good-bye to E as we stood in the temporary foster home. E was coming home for good...our home..Sara, Andy, and E's home.

E has been settling in really well. He seems to have adjusted to his new surroundings and new schedule. I am off work for almost 10 weeks and then Andy will be off work for 10 weeks. I am loving having all of this time off work to spend with E. Every day he is surprising us with something new..new phrases, new emotions, new foods he likes/dislikes, etc. He is such a sweet and loving child. E loves to run up and give us hugs for no reason other than he wants to give us a hug. If we leave the room, even for a minute, when we re-enter the room and he notices this, he will drop everything to run over squealing mommy or daddy and give us a hug. It is the cutest thing ever.

We were a little worried that E would regress some when he realized that he wasn't going back to other foster home. So far, haven't really seen any of that. He has had some very typical two year old tantrums. The hardest part is us not letting him see us laugh when he has some of these tantrums. He is quite the character...furrows his brow, crosses his arm stomps across the room, all the while speaking in his own little language--which I'm guessing isn't pleasantries.

The first weekend in Nov, Andy's mom and her husband, Bob, were in town for a wedding so they were able to meet E. E loved his Grandma Diana and Grandpa Bob. He had so much fun and was so sad when they left. E loves meeting new people and gets so sad when they leave.

We had dreamed for so long what it would be like to be parents and it is so much better than I ever thought it would be. Yes, there are days when I'm exhausted or nights I didn't get much sleep but it so worth it. We have lots to learn still but luckily have a great support system from our families and friends. The long road to get to this point was hard but it was so worth it, as we are now the parents to an absolutely adorable little boy who already brought us so much joy.